It is a truth generally known that St Thomas's is notorious for coercing students into events and competitions they do not want nor like. (forgive me for ripping Austen off)
There Comes A Time started off like that for me. Shang's workshop was barely over, when Cikgu Orlnda beckoned: "Come 'ere. You're Janang."
Just like that. No haggling, no please and will yous. Straight up statement. You're caught now. No running away. I was beyond frightened - two weeks and I've never acted ever before oh no oh no oh no.
The first practice was that very night. The first time I ever clapped my eyes on a Drama Script.
My God look at the lines! This was worse than Chinese School!
Okay, maybe not worse, but I never liked History and History had a lot of memorizing. On the other hand Cikgu Elin, who tried very hard to make us love Sejarah (and succeeded), never required me to hold a girl's hands and propose.
It's an understatement to say I was way out of my depth.
And so began a series of late night practices, of running over the lines again and again until I could remember not only mine, but my Apai's as well. And then after the lines came the emotions. Cikgu Orlnda explained to me parts of each scene:
"Here you're confident - you're ready to go out to the world and your Apai's the one that's nervous, not you ..."
or
"You're going to leave for a very long time! This is the last time you'll see her, so asking her to wait is about the same as asking her to marry you! Do you have a gf?"
"Erm, no ..."
"Man you must be doing something wrong - if Kenny can get a girlfriend and those form 3 kids are all coupled ..."
We burst out laughing, and redid the emotions for The Romantic Goodbye.
Do you know how hard it is to portray love and sadness and confusion? Frustration and anger too easy, but love! How can touches and looks - so subtle to two people - be amplified to a hundred from a lit stage?! We did it again, and again, and again, until my fidgeting felt almost second nature.
The full dress rehearsal had Patrick Yeoh (playwright) pushing us harder: "You know the part where the son comes back home from Australia? I want you to milk the drama out of that. Milk it! You have to understand that when you left the longhouse was full of life! People everywhere, Gawai celebrations ... and when you come back - empty! Silent! I want to see confusion, fear, distress! You need more emotion, more movement!"
The Students' Night held a special place in my heart - I had never acted on stage before, and boy was I nervous. It didn't help that a lot of my friends were in the crowd: Nickki and Paul smiled and waved, my makeup was pink lipstick and blusher, lots of it. Probably sweated it all out. And my parents! God my parents were in the crowd!
There is a part in the play where I come back from Australia (the one Patrick Yeoh had told me to 'milk') and I had to show my confusion and fear and uncertainty. Then I call out for Apai, and he comes out, and we hug.
That needed to work. When I enter from stage left I had in mind a scene from Jane Eyre: where Jane returns at long last to find her master's house burnt to the ground - twisted and charred. It was extremely painful to project all the shock and from that image, up the stage, down the stage, left, right, desperation. Then I call out for Apai.
He comes out.
Stares.
"Janang?"
"A - apai?
We cannot believe our eyes. We really can't. He stumbles down the carved steps, I help him.
We are at arms lenght for a second ... two.
And then we embrace.
Below the stage, unknown to us, tears had welled up in Cikgu Orlnda's eyes: I don't believe they made me cry!
We felt elated, Uncle James and I. Satisfied.
Perhaps the worse thing about this entire event was that the actual night was after the first performance, and the lull of daily life interrupted that euphoria of pulling something off spectacularly. Many said the actual night rocked better - the mics didn't act up, for one thing - but I was detached for much of the first act. It is very hard to get into the head of an Iban boy genius, especially when you only look Iban. Heh.
One of the VIPs said later that the love scenes reminded him of his youth. And it made many people think about education and the part it plays in our lives. The Borneo Post did a writeup two weeks later:
Those hoping for a happy ending will be disappointed ...Which goes to show how serious the play's subject matter was.
It was far too serious for many, however: Haznetta summed up to Fiona: "It was all Cedric ...", and Magdalan's niece told her it was bo-ring.
But I didn't mind - that night after it was all over Orlnda and I hugged backstage, jumping up and down with joy, and then we danced to traditional music and drank tuak - real tuak! - that a friend had made. I was warm and fuzzy and oh-so-happy; smiling faces everywhere and laughter and fun.
And the post production party was well worth it:
Mickey-Ds!It's a good thing St Thomas's is notorious for coercing students into events and competitions they do not want ... new vistas of feeling and thought and taste lie just outside the gates, discovered through an unceremonious kick in the butt from a teacher.
Now all you have to do is to reach out and grab it.
