St Thomas's Sports Day 2008

The following are the photos I am most happy with, both in terms of clarity and of composition. Sports day is a brilliant excuse for a photoshoot.

Distant shot of the stadium.


All six of the house flags unfurled. This was taken from grass level, with cloud cover. Noel won.


Hai Chean and Teck Chaw at the medic bay. This is my favourite shot - the lines of the windows and the texture of the wall behind was just plain lucky to get. Love it.


Andrew Aeries in flight


A PBSM station along the track. They were a little bored.


Prefects. Emma on the left; Danielle on the right.


"A good run." Lelaki A athletes after an event.


Cikgu Hush in the teacher's event. The fancy shades are so like him.


The long and winding road? Not quite.


Randy Roy just before the 800m. I believe he got near-last place.


The flag posts in front of the stadium. Kevin Lai took this. Clever boy.


Mark Ding and his Alpha. *nudges Sam*


Relay Lelaki D. The first runners were already in position.


Mr Choo caught reading under an umbrella he just set up. "If I see this published anywhere I will sue you!" Heh. Let's pray he doesn't find this blog.


That's my 3rd speaker Jared roaring at the back there.


Chemistry Kung Fu.


Ms Lee wrapping up for the Teachers' Event.


Chin Yang paying the oxygen debt.


Mr Wong getting ready for his event. He was the slowest of the first runners, but in the end his team won.

There were, of course, things that couldn't be captured on camera. Haznetta's sakai laugh as I pinched a photo on an iPod touch. The debate brief on the first day, which ended with all of us giving up on the motion (This House Believes That We Need Money). And Mounsey just managing to break into 3rd place

Marilyn (or was it Marie?): "Mounsey 4th! Lost by 1 mark!"

Me: "WHAT!?!?"

Marie (or was it Marilyn?): "No, haven't count yet!"

Lily: "Already right?"

Marie (or was it Marilyn?): "Haven't! Lelaki D had a miscalculation just now."

Lily: "Really?"

Tense silence as everyone gathers around Cikgu Elaine. She gives the calculator a few last taps, and then scribbles '3' next to Mounsey's name.

"WE GOT 3rd!!!!!!!!" Marilyn (or was it Marie?) screams. "By 7 marks somemore!"

And then the twins and I jump around the tabulation room and go crazy and hi-five and whoop our brains out.

Good days. Noel first again, Hose second, and the stands emptied out as the principal was making his speech.

Some things in life just don't change.

Photolog: After Sukma Training

Kenny Is Wise

I've just finished thinking about Kenny Voon's reply to my post on leadership, and Paul has done a sterling job of articulating most of what I want to say in the comments there. I do, however, feel that a reply on my end is in order.

First off: to Kenny, thank you. You are wise and I've always respected your opinion, and this is no exception. I'm grateful for the things you've pointed out.

In his post there is a very humbling paragraph that goes like this:

We had a joint debate meeting with the Marians today. I went out and bombed my speech. And I was very, very pissed while creating the case and organizing the teams - most of the Form 4s had all done a bunk. Tuition, blah. Sports training, blah. Shut up and come without an excuse for once, can't you? This meeting's for you - I wanted you to feel how it is to go against a better, more articulate female trio.

As I read the statement above, I find it interesting... Those excuses were given to me by Cedric in the olden days...

Ouch. Talk about low-blow, Kenny.

But he's right. I wasn't committed to the Prefectorial Board, the same way these Form 4s aren't committed to debate, and I gave excuses. This paragraph alone was a kick to my nether-regions: it was painful, yes, but it was also necessary for me to see I wasn't very different from these people I am angry with. Though it must be said I never gave excuses for Judo in that same time period, and I never gave excuses when told I was to organize a camp for my church. It was all a matter of priorities, and the Prefectorial Board simply wasn't very high in mine. (Just as debate isn't very high in my Form 4s).

Kenny's main point that what you take out from the Prefectorial Board is what you put into it is absolute true. I agree with him, and it must be said that his point applies to many of the other things in life. I didn't put much into the Prefectorial Board, so I didn't gain much, in terms of leadership.

But it also must be said that the 2005/2006 Prefectorial Board, while being so highly held in Kenny's regard, is inherently flawed. The ideal leadership training course is one of advancement. If members were to start as OPs, then to move up as SPs, and then SSPs, and then on to KPs, they would gain a lot of leadership ability. But try to imagine, for an instance, that an SP were immediately promoted to Ms Chong's job (which is a good analogy to the role of debate founding president). Would leadership seem so easy then? You would have no teacher to help you, no system to follow (except that which you create), and your Exco people would not respect you until you prove your worth to them. You have to deal with office politics, you would have to deal with the administration, you would have to fight for the rights to your club, you would have to organize and work with people from other schools, and you would have to lecture your members/prefects when the need arises. All of them. Including your Exco.

Leadership is not as easy as peanuts.

In fact, being leaders are as easy as peanuts. I remember the days I played the role as leader in clubs and Senior Prefect, I didn't really get to do stuff. All I had to do was just commanding people...

Which explains everything. That is management, which is quite different from leadership. You had superiors to help you if things went wrong. If a prefect did not comply to your requests you can always refer him/her to Ms Chong for disciplinary action. I am 'Ms Chong', for all sakes and purposes here in the debate club. And I do not have her skills, her talents, or her abilities. Which is why I am learning so much on the job - I doubt even the Head Prefect would know everything there is to do in Ms Chong's position.

Sometimes I actually wish Ms Chong was still here, so I could ask her for help.

But Kenny's reply has done me a lot of good. I've let my ego grow uncontrolled these past few weeks, and it's about time somebody (and circumstances) brought me back down on my knees. Sara has done that already, and so has Paul, and now it's Kenny's turn. Kenny has always had an eye out for his friends, and now, even at the other end of the South China Sea, he's whacked me hard in the shins.

I'm very sure, very certain... it's most of the time Cedric feels all himself is right ...

Oh, Kenny, you have no idea. There's reason to the word Knucklehead, and my sisters waste no time in pointing that out.

Thank you very much.

Leadership Sucks

Being a founding president is never easy. I sometimes wish Ravin had done it before I did, but he did his part in the creation of a debate club and I can't complain. But there are days when I just break down and wonder if it's all worth it. The passion. The training. The expenditure of energy to train a bunch of 15 odd blowhards who probably won't appreciate what you're teaching them anyway. The preparation of debate motions at 12 midnight, after Judo training (I've a small gash on my chest at the moment; I think it'll leave a scar).

Creating this debate club has been a fight from the start. I fought with the administration for about 6 odd months, and then I fought with certain factions of the English Department who didn't want to disturb the status quo (much less the creation of a new club), and then I had to make promises that the club would deliver a win sooner or later.

So the club got created, after a 2 period meeting with all the teachers of the English Department, the principal, the co-curricular administrator, and me. We settled our conflicting interests (somewhat), and in the end the school suggested a system that placed the debate club under the English Language Society, though with an independent board, independent meetings, and an independent leadership.

Which was very stupid, if you asked me, but I won't look a gift horse in the mouth. I took the package. I started recruiting. Then the trouble started.

Now I've to admit here that I know very little about leadership. You know the Prefectorial Board's claim to train you to be a leader? They're lying. Through their teeth. Being a leader's a whole lot different from playing games in a group and checking student uniforms at recess. It's all up to you: you make or break your organization. So I ran on my own power for the first few months.

But boundless energy does have its limits. I may be a so-so teacher, and I may be an above average debator, but put that together with State Judoka and STPM student and you've got a very tired boy on your hands. Ravin once said it seems, at times, that I eat coffee beans for breakfast. But guess what? Coffee-bean-hyper-boy grew up. I was Form 3 then, the world seemed a nicer, brighter place, and I didn't yet know the joys of doing 95kg deadlifts.

So I realized that I could not do this on my own. I talked to the Form 5s. And I made a mistake of thinking them all as Judokas. Dedicated, passionate, not lazy. No excuses. I forgot that they were typical Malaysians, and that none of them has had mental toughness drilled into them by a sport. You may think I'm boasting, or I'm an arrogant blowhard myself, but you try attending one of our Sukma sparring sessions. It's a thrown-and-get-up mentality, and no excuses for stopping a match, unless you've broken something. So far 5 people have broken something. Go figure.

So two Form 5s dropped out. Too many activities, too busy, excuse after excuse after excuse. I let them go. Nevermind. Still got Form 4s. I selected my board - my team - and it seemed the only thing I did right then was to choose Saravana as vice-president. He's coffee-bean-hyper and he's not afraid to stand up to me when I'm doing something wrong (or not doing something at all), and that's what I needed. I am grateful for Sara. A godsend.

The other Form 5s are good, passionate, serious debators. I can work with these people. We joke, we talk, and we argue. Though sometimes I think they don't understand what I'm saying, because I talk too fast. Always been a weakness of mine. My brain moves faster than my mouth and everything comes out a convoluted mess.

The people I cannot work with, however, are the Form 4s. They're not even serious. They come in and shoot all kinds of off-tangent, immature, unpolished points. They're all over the place. They start talking about gigolos when I'm discussing male vs female driving. It's partly my fault - I guess - I had too high expectations and I introduced the tough bits of debate to them too early.

We had a joint debate meeting with the Marians today. I went out and bombed my speech. And I was very, very pissed while creating the case and organizing the teams - most of the Form 4s had all done a bunk. Tuition, blah. Sports training, blah. Shut up and come without an excuse for once, can't you? This meeting's for you - I wanted you to feel how it is to go against a better, more articulate female trio.

And you can see what I've been doing wrong: I tried to do everything myself, at first. When that failed I got myself a team, but I did not communicate my plan and my vision to them. Heck, most of them don't even know how hard I've worked my ass off for the creation of the club, and for their training. And then after that I couldn't leverage these people, because they weren't on my side. They didn't get the whole picture. My fault again. And now? I don't know how to bloody hell get the Form 4s serious. To wake them up and say: 'hey, I'm working my butt off for you, what the shit are you doing for me? Or for your school?'

So it's more like a lack of communication, and a lack of leveraging teams. I've got Sara on my side now, that's something. And Paul, Rav and Aldrin have been godsends. They've come and adjudicated, and we've really learnt a lot of things from them. It's also slightly hard for me to train my juniors because I've always been a wildcard myself. I can save debates single-handed, and I can fail everyone and polarize the judges so badly we lose. And now I have to teach them all I know, and I realize most of this is ... what? Second nature? Inbred? I don't know. I'm not very good at teaching. How the hell do I explain my rebuttals come from a little voice in my head?

The important question is this: how am I going to make it right again? To make sure the debate club succeeds long after I leave the school? To ensure everyone gets a fair chance at learning something, rather than just the talented ones, the ones handpicked by Cikgu Orlnda, like during my time? I'm not a leader. Never have been, unless you count the times in social gatherings when everyone's bored and I take it into my hands to do something about that. And it's so friggin difficult. Head prefects have existing systems, and Interact presidents have adult attachment organizations helping them, teaching them. Me? There's no path for me to follow, no system for me to adhere to. And that is very liberating until you figure out it's you who's got to create the system.

I may not be a leader, I may completely be out of my depth, but I better start getting used to it. Because it's what I wanted. It's what I chose. Leader qualities or no, I am one.

And I better start acting like it.

Pak Lah Is Nice!

I am in my aunt's car, on the way back from Judo, and I am sweaty, smelly, and bandaged in all the usual places. I tap the white cloth tips of my fingers on her dashboard and the conversation turns to politics, as it usually does these few days after the opposition's unprecedented win in the parliamentary elections.

"It's such a pity about Khairy, you know." she is saying, "Everyone was hoping so much from him, and he still had to play the race card."

"It's easy." I reply. "You get instant support from the ultra-Malays that way."

"Yah of course it's easy. Even the dap does it -"

"The what?" I say

"D-A-P."

"Oh."

A pause. My aunt turns into Tabuan Jaya. Then: "Well the current hot topic now seems to be Badawi stepping down."

"Mahathir, right?"

"Yeah. It's Mahathir who wants him to step down."

"Which is kinda stupid! I mean, who else does he expect can take over? Najib?!"

"But Mahathir wants Najib to take over!" My aunt says, taking her eyes off the road for a second.

"What!? But Najib's an asshole!"

"And why do you say that?" Eyebrows raised.

"He's ugly!"

"And ...?"

I rack my brains for an answer. "He once said 'Parliament does not need opposition party because government MPs themselves can raise issues in sittings.' What kind of a stupid immature remark is that? Pak Lah will never say that!" I pause. "On the other hand, he never does say anything ..."

My aunt chuckles. "Well they do say he's weak and all. The nice guy ..."

We are turning into my lorong now, and there is silence in the car for awhile. Then:

"I just realized I said something very immature."

"What?"

I feel a grin spreading itself over my face: "Najib is ugly."

Eli James 4.0: The Redesign

It's a move back into green.

Eli James: The Blog is now officially version 4.0, with a few big differences. It's not a 3 hour job like the last time ... this version's clocked in about 6-7 hours, mostly due to dicky Photoshop skills and no prior knowledge of javascript.

Look Ma ... No Sidebars!

This version is one column (as you can all so clearly see), and it's constructed so as to highlight the writing on the blog, as opposed to pictures. When I started this redesign I wanted to test how far I could push the Blogger platform; to see if I could make this look like a Wordpress blog. I think I've succeeded, though I'm still playing around with the usability aspect of this design.

Peekaboo! I See You!

The peekaboo slider at the top of the blog is powered by jQuery. In simple language it's a write less code, do more fancy shwag Javascript library that condenses what might take over 50 lines to 5 lines. Learning the code for the slider took me 4 hours, and in the process I just about pissed off everyone who was chatting with me in WLM. For that I'm very sorry, and I reward you with ... a goat.

Okay not really.

This redesign is hardly finished ... I've to iron out little bits and pieces like a non-existent navigation and a link list. Taking down the sidebar has forced me to put things in very weird places, and the usability of this blog will suffer for the first few weeks.

Have patience, tell me what you think, and enjoy.

Supporting BN Is Hard On The Internet

My hat's off to Kenny Sia: just when you think the blogosphere's lost to the opposition alone he does the noble thing and gives the limelight to both sides of the political divide. While these two interviews affirm my current stand on the political situation in Kuching (and probably Malaysia), both did a bit to widen my view on some of the problems faced by SUPP and DAP alike.

I like Alan Sim. Comparing the two interviews on kennysia.com, Alan comes off as the more mature person. The more intelligent one: the one who makes sound arguments and tackles topics with a clear eye on the big picture. He's the guy the debater in me likes - at the back of my head the little voice that yaks whenever a lousy argument comes up was silent, actually nodding at the things he says.

Alan: ... not many, eventhough I realise that out of every two person I think one of them is gonna be on the other side. In general, people are still quite polite. That should be the kind of culture that we should encourage. We can have political differences. We don't have to get too personal about it. That's my view.

Hell, Malaysia needs more people like him. And it's a pity he has to keep mum on certain issues, because the interview gave the impression that he wanted to say more but couldn't. His replies in the kennysia interview were vague and they glossed over the undercurrents of unease in our society. Which was sad. Want to bring about change? Difficult if your party is restrictive by nature.

And it's funny that while Alan's interview was hampered by the limits of his party line, DAP's Chong Chieng Jen came off worse. Yeah he was entertaining in his video, and yeah he did gave good examples of how he helped change government policy (the 1st silicone sale, in particular, must have been very satisfying for him), but his replies are more reactionary and less policy oriented. Alan shows a good understanding of democratic principle, Chong makes jokes about our CM's pubic hair. Chong will probably win. The rakyat loves this kind of mudslinging, they don't consider candidate policy.

And that is the sad thing about Malaysia.

I've made my political stance clear on this blog, and BUGS, and everytime I do my friends blow me over for not being democratic enough. They can't believe I give credence to the current administration and not support DAP 110%. They shake their heads in disbelief and tell me 'you don't know anything la, you ... I know better', and they go all out, arms asunder, brains left behind, hot on the campaign trail for The Rocket. I respect such passion. I really do. It's like football fan riots: their friends start going crazy and they catch hold of a catchy phrase, and soon it is widely accepted truth because the whole crowd is repeating it mindlessly.

The truth is hell will freeze over before I support a candidate like Chong. Harken the following:

Are the lives of poultry in Semenanjung Malaysia more important than those of the children in Sarawak? Note: 2 Ministers replied to the Emergency Motion on birds' [sic] flu while only 1 Deputy Minister replied to such motion on Hand Foot And Mouth disease in Sarawak.

I have a folder, you know, in my room, where I keep examples of stupid statements made by Malaysian politicians. This is going in straight with the best of them. There are three logical flaws in the above statement, all of which came screaming into my head as I read it.

1. The number of Ministers responding to motions do not reflect the Government attitude towards respective diseases.
2. Bird flu is a global threat, with international pressure applied on Malaysia to set up regional control measures. HFM isn't likely to cause a deadly epidemic. Bird flu mutates with every host and has even overcome Tamiflu inoculation.
   
3. Exactly what does Bird Flu prevention have to do with the relative importance of poultry and children? I am interested to know, Chong. Please educate me.

Elections don't do me any good. On one hand BN's corruption is aired (the stink!); on the other the opposition shouts accusations and hurls personal attacks, often with little or superficial intellectual content. It's a lose-lose situation for a cynical kid to be in. Fatalism suddenly seems more attractive an option. Hell - if I believe in fate it doesn't matter who wins, right?

I'll get back to my school work now. At least there, in my book, the answers are in black and white.