Shenanigans

It is MUET class again and the whole class is involved in a lively discussion about the lower six. We do this in order to do as little class work as possible. It succeeds every time.

"I think the girls this year are more beautiful." Mdm Kong says. She appears not to notice the girls in my class; they stop whatever they're doing to stare at her. "Look at L6S2 - some of them very sweet looking."

"Yah." says Teck Chaw, "the girls in our year all so ugly wan."

The class erupts into protest and laughter and Nyuk Choo shouts "KILL HIM!" in Mandarin.

"Teacher we still haven't seen your niece." I say. This is pure cheek - she was boasting about Melissa's beauty before the mid terms and naturally we were all curious as to what kind of beauty this was. (Later we find out that it is the fair skin, big eyes, slim and willowy kind, but for the moment we have only a description to work with).

"Eh?" Mdm Kong says. She does not understand the angle I'm taking yet, but the rest of the class are grinning like idiots, even the girls.

"Teacher I think I fall in love already." says Teck Chaw.

It clicks now and Mdm Kong lectures us about the futility of relationships in Form 6 ("You know all the - what yuu call it? - emotions. Very distracting. Yes."). She tells us it affects us emotionally and she hopes Melissa will only get a boyfriend after university. Then, after we have exhausted the topic, she starts on how she doesn't like men who sweet talk.

"My mother always told me don't trust sweet talks -" (Tay chuckles as she says this) "-my husband never say I love you. Of my two boyfriend last time the first one like to sweet talk a lot. Don't like it."

"So teacher you only got two boyfriends?" Teck Chaw asks.

"Yes."

"And the second one become your husband?"

"Yes."

"So when did you have your first boyfriend?"

The features on Mdm Kong's face suddenly rearrange themselves: they switch from surprise to discomfort and finally settle on embarrassment.

"Uh." she says. "In Form 6."